Many of the woman that I work with frequently notice after a counseling or healing session just how deeply tired they are. They aren't just tired physically, they are tired emotionally and spiritually. They are tired of thinking, behaving and acting in ways that they think are acceptable to themselves and/or to others. They are tired of wearing the masks that once seemed necessary to survive and to make it in the world.
As they drop the defenses, the expectations, the people pleasing, the suppression of certain emotions and the denial of certain desires, they start to feel how being someone else is utterly exhausting. There is a sense of relief when they give themselves permission to be more honest. As a result they start allowing more of their authentic selves to take the lead.
So how do you know if you AREN'T being yourself?
-You feel anxious most of the time. You can't seem to relax and your mind is always on.
-You feel empty. There is a chronic sense that something is missing or that you are always outside yourself.
-You think more about others needs and you either deny your own needs or are unaware that you have any needs.
-You are afraid to speak what you feel because you aren't sure what you're really feeling.
-You deny certain parts of yourself because you judge them and find them unacceptable (including your unique gifts and skills).
-You harshly criticize and doubt yourself.
And how do you know when you ARE being yourself?
-You feel a sense of inner peace and acceptance regardless of outer circumstances.
-You feel connected and fulfilled.
-You have an awareness of your needs and are able to lovingly take action to fulfill them.
-You are connected to the feelings in your body and are aware and responsible for your emotions.
-You're open and willing to allow more compassion and self forgiveness towards the parts of you that you judge or deny.
-You are connected to your inner knowing, your intuition, and you allow this to guide your actions.
Becoming more of who you are is indeed a process. There is no perfection in this process, there is only learning how to be more of yourself. Becoming more of yourself involves awareness and a willingness to listen. We usually decide to change and become more of who we really are when something internally or externally wakes us up. When we wake up to our exhaustion, our lack of fulfillment, our chronic emptiness, we become more willing to see beyond who we thought we were. When we wake up to our suffering, more light can come in and it starts to illuminate the masks, the survival strategies and the falsehood. This is when we can start to gain real access to our power, our divinity, our true selves. The light illuminates who we are not so that we can become who we are.
In my work with clients I offer private sessions and spiritual tools to help you reclaim yourself and thus make decisions that are in greater alignment with your truth.
If you are ready to grow beyond your current limitations and gain access to more self knowledge, I would be honored to work with you!
How many times have you had an inspiration, a thought, that totally lit you up and as soon as you started to consider the possibility you started to doubt it? What burning desires do you have inside of you that you are too afraid to put into action or to take a risk creating?
So many of us settle for a life of safety (surviving), rather than a life of inspired risk (living). We settle for small boxes that keep us limited and in fear. We have convinced ourselves that these boxes are real—that we are nothing beyond our fears. I too know very well this feeling of imprisonment. I have felt trapped in self imposed boxes, wanting so desperately to get out, all the while forgetting that I was the only one that had to key to my freedom. A few years ago I had a series of reoccurring dreams where I found myself trapped, usually inside nothing more than a flimsy structure, but in the dreams I was convinced that there was no way out. After dreaming about this a few times I started to get the message, and it became almost comical to me when I realized it—I wasn’t trapped, I was merely misperceiving my own ability and power to overcome certain external and internal obstacles. I was afraid to take certain risks and face certain fears and fully 'show up', and as a result I was limiting my capacity to fully live. This ‘aha’ (delivered thanks to my subconscious mind) helped me to reframe a lot. The only thing that was preventing what I desired was me. When we spend too much time in boxes, we begin to feel like a victim of our circumstances and we believe that we have no choice but to pace aimlessly in our personally constructed prison. We dream of what it would be like to escape these walls, to live on the other side of this prison, but when the risk seems too great—what if I can’t do it? What if I fail? What if I am rejected? WHAT IF?---We decide that this is the best that we can do and as a result life continues to reflect this back to us.
One of the greatest powers that we possess is choice. No matter how small or seemingly insurmountable something appears we always have a choice in how we respond to it. This doesn’t mean that the choice will be easy, but there is possibility and potential in realizing that we do have a choice.
So, what choices are you faced with right now? What burning desires are trying to get your attention? Do you want to become more healthy and fit, start a new business, ignite a buried passion, learn to forgive, cultivate courage, follow a higher calling in life—whatever it is that you desire to create, I am here to support you in making it happen. When you're facing fear in the face, ask yourself, what would courage have me do? Listen for that small voice of truth inside of your heart and trust that it holds the key to your power and greatness. What would you risk if you knew that beyond safety lies more freedom? If you're feeling stuck and can't seem to get out of your own way, reach out for some coaching or a healing session-- I have some amazing tools to help support you. I look forward to the next leg of your journey!